What's That Smell

Christmas break with everyone has been great until this morning, when I woke up to the aroma of dog shit.  Ugh... That never typically happens and Tandy and I never agree on the guilty party, however we both agree it wasn't Millie (English Bulldog).  I wrestle all the time with Bella, our old Golden, about the time to put her down.  It is a hard decision, but we are at the point that we check to see if she is breathing sometimes.  I am sure sensible and heart-led pet owners all have this struggle to say, "Ok, it is time."

During Christmas break I have been with people of different beliefs, faiths, political views, economical status, genders, cultures, and intelligence.  The interesting part of it all was we all say the same things in our own way, "When is it time?"  I am not just saying it about particular issues of the world, but we all say it.  "When is it time to... take that trip.... change a job...get up...move...feel better...love more...let go...hold on?"  We tend to think about the bigger issues of the world first, political views and changes, investigations, walls, government shut downs, wars, discriminations, and dehumanizations.  Those are all very important...very important, but to be honest I am just a small drop in an ocean that needs the color of the water to change.  Those changes take time.  Smaller changes, self changes can happen right now.  Nevertheless, most of us sit and say, "When is it time to...?"

I have also taken notice that there is a very fine line with tolerance, mercy, and enabling which most of us have not figured out and it creates most of our life problems big or small.  The end result of us not finding balance or clarity of tolerance, mercy, and enabling is the same.  We wake up smelling shit.  By the time we decide to talk to family or friends about issues we have already smelt the shit.  Then you start the cycle of, "I don't know what to do."  As you bounce off ideas from those you love or respect for solutions, constantly in your nostrils is that stench you woke-up to... shit.

I personally at times am waiting to wake-up.  With different issues, I have gotten accustom to the smell.  I will own it.  Not sure if there is anyway to wake-up once that happens or maybe I am not suppose to, however it is clear that someone somewhere who is sensible and heart-led will say to me, "Ok, it is time,"  whenever I need it.  I am blessed that way.  I always use the thought, It takes a community or village to raise a child so chose yours wisely.  In Appalachia, it is very common to hear terrible grammar or crazy slang... "But I am not done with my raisen."  I need all the community and village I can get, because I understand my weaknesses and at times wake-up to the smell of shit.

Last Words

As I have sat today and watched the funeral events for our 41st President, it makes me emotional.  This is going to be a short thought for today,  however two things are constantly running in my mind. What would be my last words?  How will I be remembered?  I agree with the messages today during the service.  We all have an imprint we place on the world; What will mine be?  Have I been kind enough? Loved enough?  Taught the boys enough?  Extended my hand enough?  As we live this life I am not sure ENOUGH will ever happen.  But it was stated today and even throughout the Bible, "The  Vision of Life does not happen until Death."  So it is not mine to display.  The goal now is to not ever let ENOUGH happen.